22:35 oct 10th.

Had a drink last night got pissed, enjoyed it actually but felt like shit this morning, having another this evening.  only 4 cans.

i wouldnt have last night, but i had the house to myself and i really like to chill and blast choons and enjoy when i have me time.   tonight i just want a drink...no reason i just want one !

21:43pm Tuesday 8th October.
No Drink and not that bothered about it.
Making Thai Curry and it smells delish.

Chest still a bit iffy, doctors was a waste of time.
...and am tired.  Haven't been to the gym tonight as didn't feel up to it, think the massage earlier today knocked me out a bit.

But happy i haven't had beer :-)

22:00 7th oct 2013 - No drink. :-)

Had flu jab today, so no gym as felt a we bit groggy. chest is really bad and has been for a few days, so will make an apt at docs, :-(.

Not actually bothered about beer tonight, which i am pleased about.

today was a bullish*t day, tho i had one successful viewing.  Tenant moving in tomorrow.
Hopefully that will shut the whingy landlord up.

20:45 - Sunday 6th October.
Last night of drink, i only have 4 cans and thats me whack.

Woke up with a bad head again, so this is last night of crap.  Having problems with my chest due to the decorating being done...so much dust and i'm obviously allergic.  Gym session was good, 40 mins of spinning and 100 -10 abs workout.

Bought a huge scratchpost for cats, and a plastic shelving unit to go in their enclosure.
replaced the bedding for the tortoises to what they are supposed to have 'top soil'.

Now i need to either adapt the open vivarium to make it into a tortoise table, or just buy a TT.

Ive never used my blue inhaler sooo much since the decorating, the beer aint helping.  Im guessing a trip to the docs for some antihistamines is in order, possibly antibiotics...but i don't like taking them!
Watching X-Factor.

Feeling: Reasonably chilled out and wondering what tomorrow will bring.  hey ho. Looking forward to my hour long massage on tuesday :-)  

14:16 saturday 5th october,
I have a banging head, and feel like sh*t.   makes me wonder why i would put myself through it every evening.  saying that if you drink everyday then the poison 'so to speak' is still in your system and doesn't have an effect 'hangover' the following day.

I'm wondering now if i will drink tonight ?

I had looked into AA, but read they talk about god etc, and that really isn't my thing.
there doesn't appear to be any forums  or chat type things online, where you can received support from
other people like myself.

So im pottering in the greenhouse, arranging the tortoise house with Buddy's help (cat).
Going to make Quiche, then head off to the gym a bit later on after i've had a healthy snack.

Im hoping the outcome of this online diary will help me realise the damage i am doing to myself.
Its kinda like self harming i guess ! 'not good' !!

Maybe my thoughts will one day be read by others in the same/similar situation, and some how helps others to quit she sh*t.

22:30 fri 4th oct 2013
i've had 4 cans of bud and gone back for more.

i also made a thai vegan curry which went down well.
im tired and watching breaking bad.

the cats are doing thier usual at this time of night, playing!

once this episode is finished i will retire to my bed

again for some reason i am sneezing none stop!  annoying

Chill out Maan!

Friday 4th October 20:10
Its the weekend, and i'm having a 4 pack of bud of drinks with housemate.  I knew fri & sat would be a challenge... i'm not too disappointed as I've manage to go 5 days without a drink.

I will probably regret it in the morning, but i know i will sleep.
When i don't drink i cannot sleep.

Really don't want this crap to take control of me.

Quite tired after a strange week, of court appeals, police boarding up windows after tenants have smashed them. drugs raids and tenants expecting to live rent free and shouting and swearing down the phone at you.

DSS tenants really to take the piss.....maybe this will be a sub chapter in this journey.